Planning a funeral is one of life’s most challenging tasks, especially when dealing with the emotional toll of losing a loved one. However, understanding the steps involved and knowing what to expect can help make the process more manageable. This guide walks you through essential tasks, decisions, and considerations when arranging a funeral, ensuring that the service honors the deceased and provides comfort to those in mourning.
What Do I Need to Know Before Arranging a Funeral
Before starting the process, it is essential to understand the basic elements of funeral arrangements. Funerals typically include a service, a viewing or visitation (optional), and final disposition of the body. However, the process can vary depending on religious, cultural, and personal preferences
First, familiarize yourself with common funeral terminology. Terms such as “direct burial,” “cremation,” “wake,” and “obituary” may be unfamiliar if you haven’t handled these matters before. For example, direct burial refers to burying the body without a formal funeral service, while a wake is an informal gathering, typically held the evening before the funeral.
See our glossary of terms.
There are also legal requirements to consider. You will need to obtain a death certificate, issued by a doctor or coroner, which is required for handling the deceased’s estate and arranging burial or cremation. Depending on where you live, additional permits may be required, especially if the body must be transported across state or provincial borders.
Learn about where to get a death certificate in the US and Canada
Time is also a factor when planning a funeral. Many funerals are arranged within a week of the person’s death, but religious or cultural customs can affect the timing. For instance, Jewish and Muslim traditions often call for burial within 24 hours, while other customs may allow for more flexibility.
Don’t overlook cultural or religious traditions that could influence the funeral. Different cultures have specific funeral rituals or ceremonies that must be observed. If you’re unsure of what’s expected, consult a religious or cultural leader for guidance.
Determining the Deceased Person’s Wishes
One of the most important parts of planning a funeral is determining whether the deceased left instructions regarding their funeral. This may include the type of service, burial preferences, or other wishes. Knowing where to find this information can ease the decision-making process.
Start by checking if the deceased left a will. Wills or estate planning documents often contain instructions about the deceased’s preferred method of disposition (burial, cremation, aquamation) and the type of service they wanted (religious, non-religious, memorial). If a will exists, consult the executor or attorney to review any relevant instructions.
You should also check with local funeral homes to see if the deceased arranged a prepaid funeral plan. Prepaid plans often outline specific preferences for caskets, urns, services, and burial or cremation options.
Another place to check is whether the deceased left a living will or advance medical directive. While these documents are mainly for healthcare decisions, they sometimes include end-of-life preferences, including funeral arrangements.
In many cases, people share their wishes with close family members or friends. Ask immediate family members if the deceased expressed any verbal preferences for their funeral. Although not legally binding, it is important to honor these wishes if possible.
If no formal documents or verbal instructions exist, check the deceased’s personal belongings. Some people leave informal notes, letters, or journals that indicate their preferences. You may also want to check for online content, as social media or email correspondence may reveal the deceased’s thoughts about their funeral.
Lastly, check with the deceased’s spiritual leader if they had a religious affiliation. Religious leaders may have had discussions with the deceased about specific preferences for their funeral or end-of-life rites.
What Are the Steps to Arranging a Funeral
Arranging a funeral can seem overwhelming, but breaking the process down into manageable steps can help. Here’s a general overview of the key steps involved in planning a funeral:
Notify the appropriate people. Begin by contacting close family members and friends to inform them of the death. You will also need to notify key individuals, such as the deceased’s employer, attorney, or life insurance provider. If a religious or spiritual leader will be involved in the funeral, reach out to them as well.
Choose a funeral home. Selecting a funeral home is one of the most important decisions in the planning process. Funeral homes offer essential services, from handling the body to coordinating the service and filing paperwork.
See Questions to ask a funeral director
Compare several funeral homes based on their services, reputation, and pricing. In the U.S. and Canada, funerals typically cost between $1,000 to $12,000 USD, while in Canada, prices range from $1,500 to $15,000 CAD, depending on location and services. Planning a funeral without a formal memorial event such as receptions, wakes, viewings and religious services will drastically reduce your costs.
Determine the type of service. Decide what kind of service you’d like to hold. You can opt for a traditional funeral, a memorial service, or a celebration of life. The tone and structure of the service will largely depend on the wishes of the family and the deceased, if known.
Plan the viewing or visitation. If you choose to have a viewing or visitation, coordinate with the funeral home to set a time and place. Viewings are usually held before the funeral service, giving friends and family a chance to say their goodbyes.
Finalize disposition arrangements. This involves deciding between burial, cremation, or another method of disposition, such as aquamation. Burial services can range from $8,000 to $15,000 USD in the U.S. and $10,000 to $20,000 CAD in Canada. Cremation costs generally range from $1,000 to $4,000 USD in the U.S. and $1,500 to $5,000 CAD in Canada.
Write an obituary and send invitations. Draft an obituary to honor the deceased and announce the service. Obituaries can be published in newspapers, online, or both. Invitations can be sent via traditional mail, email, or through social media, depending on the formality and size of the service.
What Are the Choices to Be Made
Throughout the planning process, several important choices will need to be made to shape the funeral service. These decisions may include service type, location, flowers, and more.
Disposition type
If you are considering a funeral without any (immediate) memorial events consider:
- Direct cremation: The body is cremated within a day or two or death. No formal event is arranged. But one can be held later.
- Direct burial: The body is buried within a day or two or death. No formal memorial event is arranged. But one can be held later.
If you are considering a more traditional funeral:
- Burial: The body is placed in a casket and buried in a cemetery. A viewing or visitation may occur before this happens. A reception may be arranged after burial.
- Cremation: The body is reduced to ashes and the ashes are returned to the family. Funeral events can be arrange before or after cremation, immediately or later. A reception is arranged the same week. But could be deferred to later.
Service type
Service type is one of the first choices. You’ll need to decide whether to hold a traditional funeral, a memorial service, or a celebration of life. Traditional funerals often include religious elements, while memorial services and celebrations of life tend to be more informal.
Casket or urn selection
Casket or urn selection is another key decision. Funeral homes offer a variety of caskets and urns at different price points. The cost of caskets ranges from basic wooden models to elaborate metal ones, while urns can be made from a variety of materials, including wood, ceramic, and metal. Some families choose to purchase multiple keepsake urns for dividing the ashes among family members.
Funeral location
Location is another consideration. Funerals are commonly held at a funeral home, religious institution, or graveside, but other locations, such as private homes or outdoor settings, may be appropriate depending on family preferences and the deceased’s wishes.
Transportation
Transportation of the remains is often necessary for both the body and the family. Hearses are commonly used to transport the deceased, while some funeral homes offer limousines to transport close family members.
Funeral Program
You’ll also need to organize a funeral program, which outlines the order of events, including eulogies, readings, prayers, and music. To create a printed program, you can use customizable templates available through services like Canva or Adobe’s free funeral program maker, found at Adobe Express.
Reception
Some families choose to host a post-service reception where guests can share food and memories of the deceased. Depending on your preference, the reception can be formal, with catering, or informal, with simple refreshments. It can occur before a funeral, on the day of a funeral or after the funeral.
Graves and Markers
Selecting a final resting place, whether it’s a traditional burial plot, a plaque, or a marker, is an important decision that reflects the deceased’s wishes, family traditions, and your budget.
- Grave Plot: Typically chosen for in-ground burials. Cemeteries offer single, double, or family plots. Location, cemetery policies, and plot costs should be considered. Additionally, some cemeteries have specific areas for religious or cultural groups.
- Plaque or Memorial Marker: Commonly used in cremation gardens or on columbarium walls (for cremated remains). Plaques can be customized with inscriptions, dates, and designs. This option offers a permanent tribute in a dedicated place without requiring an entire burial plot.
- Headstones and Grave Markers: For traditional burials, selecting a headstone or grave marker is a significant way to honor the deceased. Options range from simple flat markers to more elaborate upright headstones, with materials like granite, marble, or bronze available for customization.
When choosing, consider:
- Cemetery Policies: Some cemeteries have regulations on the size, type, and material of headstones or plaques.
- Budget: Memorial markers vary greatly in cost based on material and design complexity. See cost of graves in the U.S. See also Canadian options.
- Personalization: Adding personal touches such as inscriptions, symbols, or even a photo can make the memorial more meaningful.
Funeral Funding Options
Funeral costs can add up quickly, making it important to understand your options for covering these expenses. The average funeral in the U.S. costs between $7,000 to $12,000 USD, while in Canada, the average cost ranges from $8,000 to $15,000 CAD. The price can vary depending on whether burial or cremation is chosen, the location, and the services offered.
Many families use personal savings or contributions from family members to cover funeral expenses. Life insurance may also help cover the cost of a funeral if the deceased had a policy. Prepaid funeral plans are another option, which allows the deceased to arrange and pay for their funeral in advance, easing the financial burden on their family.
In some cases, government assistance programs or community resources can help cover funeral costs, particularly for those in need. Additionally, crowdfunding platforms like GoFundMe have become a popular way for families to raise money for funeral expenses.
See more:
Help Paying for a Funeral in the U.S.
Help Paying for a Funeral in Canada
Funeral Planning Checklist
To help make the funeral planning process more manageable, use this comprehensive checklist:
- Determine the deceased’s wishes (will, prepaid plan, or verbal instructions).
- Notify family, friends, employers, and life insurance providers.
- Choose a funeral home and discuss services and pricing.
- Decide on the type of service (traditional, memorial, celebration of life).
- Plan a viewing or visitation (if desired).
- Finalize burial or cremation arrangements.
- Write and submit the obituary.
- Send invitations (printed, email, or social media).
- Create the funeral program (using Canva or Adobe’s free service).
- Arrange flowers or ask for donations in lieu of flowers.
- Organize transportation for the body and close family members.
- Plan the reception (if applicable).
- Follow up with thank-you notes after the service.
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