Planning an ash scattering ceremony is a beautiful way to honor the memory of a loved one and find peace in returning them to the earth. This sample ceremony script provides a complete outline with both religious and non-religious options, making it adaptable to different beliefs and preferences. Feel free to adjust the script to reflect the personality and wishes of the deceased.
Welcome and Opening Remarks
Begin the ceremony by welcoming attendees and setting a meaningful, reflective tone. This can be as simple or detailed as desired.
Sample Opening:
“We gather here today to celebrate the life of [Deceased’s Name]. As we scatter their ashes, we honor their memory, returning them to a place of beauty and peace. We are here to remember, to reflect, and to say goodbye.”
Opening Reflection or Prayer
This is an opportunity for a spiritual or contemplative reading. Choose a prayer or reflection that aligns with the beliefs of the deceased or their family.
Religious Option: Select a comforting prayer, such as Psalm 23 or a Buddhist prayer for peace.
Non-Religious Option: Opt for a reflective poem, like “Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep” by Mary Elizabeth Frye or “Gone From My Sight” by Henry Van Dyke. See poems and prayers below.
Eulogy or Tribute
A family member or friend can share a brief eulogy or tribute, speaking about the deceased’s life, character, and memories. This can be a moment to share memories, anecdotes, or reflections on what made them unique.
Sample Eulogy:
“[Deceased’s Name] was a remarkable person who brought so much joy and love to our lives. Today, as we gather to say goodbye, we remember the moments that defined their spirit, their kindness, and their love for all of us.”
Ritual of Release
Invite family members and friends to scatter the ashes in turns, or all together. This can be a powerful and symbolic act of returning the deceased to nature. See also: How to separate ashes.
Religious Option: Include a short prayer, such as, “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, we commit [Deceased’s Name] to the earth, in peace and love.”
Non-Religious Option: Consider a reflective line, such as, “As we release [Deceased’s Name] to the earth, we celebrate the love and joy they shared with us.”
Moment of Reflection or Silence
Allow a few minutes for quiet reflection. Music or silence can be observed here, letting attendees connect with their thoughts and memories. A favorite song or instrumental music can add a personal touch.
Closing Words and Farewell
Conclude the ceremony with words of comfort and peace, inviting people to stay and reflect further if they wish.
Sample Closing:
“May [Deceased’s Name] rest in peace, forever in our hearts and memories. Today, we honor the life they led, the love they shared, and the beautiful legacy they leave behind. May we carry their memory forward in our lives.”
Optional Additions
- Readings: Add a poem or letter that has personal significance, written by a family member or close friend.
- Music: Include a song that held meaning for the deceased or plays softly as the ashes are scattered.
- Personal Tokens: Provide flowers or petals to release with the ashes, symbolizing each person’s connection to the deceased.
Tips for a Memorable Ash Scattering Ceremony
Here are a few tips that will help with your ceremony.
Choose a Meaningful Location:
Select a place that was special to the deceased person, whether it’s a beach, a mountain, or a beloved garden. See rules for Canada and the U.S.
Check Local Regulations:
Ensure you are in compliance with local laws for scattering ashes, especially on public lands or in protected areas. See also: Scattering rules.
Plan for Weather Conditions:
Ashes can be scattered from a low height to minimize impact from wind, and water scatterings should consider the flow and current.
Encourage Participation Options:
For those uncomfortable with handling ashes, provide alternatives like releasing flowers or saying a few words.
Allow Time for Emotions:
Acknowledge that emotions may run high, and give people the space and time to reflect as needed.
Poems and Prayers for Ash Scattering Ceremonies
Below are a few poems and prayers, both religious and non-religious, that are often used in ash scattering ceremonies. These texts provide comfort, peace, and a way to reflect on the life and legacy of a loved one. For additional options, see non-religious readings or prayers for ash scattering.
Psalm 23
“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul:
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil: for thou art with me;
Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies:
Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life:
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.”
Buddhist Prayer for Peace
“May all beings be happy; may all beings be without disease.
May all beings experience the sensation of auspiciousness.
May nobody suffer in any way.
May all beings live in peace and harmony.
May our love for each other spread around the world,
bringing light to every corner of existence.”
Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye
“Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.”
The Dash by Linda Ellis
“I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning…to the end.
He noted that first came her date of birth
and spoke the following date with tears,
but he said what mattered most of all
was the dash between those years.
For that dash represents all the time
that she spent alive on earth…
And now only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own;
the cars…the house…the cash,
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend our dash.”
Gone From My Sight by Henry Van Dyke
“I am standing upon the seashore.
A ship, at my side, spreads her white sails to the moving breeze
and starts for the blue ocean.
She is an object of beauty and strength.
I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck
of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other.
Then, someone at my side says, ‘There, she is gone.’
Gone where?
Gone from my sight. That is all.
She is just as large in mast, hull, and spar as she was when she left my side.
And, she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.
Her diminished size is in me — not in her.
And, just at the moment when someone says, ‘There, she is gone,’
there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices
ready to take up the glad shout, ‘Here she comes!'”
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