How to Handle It, How to Prepare, and Other Things You Need to Know
Delivering a eulogy is one of the most personal and meaningful ways to honor a loved one. But the weight of the moment can sometimes be overwhelming, and it’s completely natural to feel emotional while speaking. This guide offers helpful tips for preparing yourself, handling your emotions, and delivering a memorable and heartfelt eulogy.
What to Expect When Delivering a Eulogy
When you stand to deliver a eulogy, you might feel a flood of emotions—grief, love, gratitude, and perhaps even nervousness. You’re not alone in feeling this way. Everyone attending the service knows that you are sharing deeply personal memories, and they will be understanding if emotions rise to the surface.
In fact, your genuine feelings can help create a heartfelt connection between you and the audience. People are there to support you and to honor the person who has passed away, so it’s perfectly acceptable to show emotion.
How to Prepare for Delivering a Eulogy
Preparation is key when delivering a eulogy. Here are several ways to help you feel more in control and confident:
- Write the Eulogy in Advance
Take your time writing the eulogy. Allow yourself to reflect on the person’s life and the moments you want to highlight. This is a personal process, and it can help you find closure as well. Consider using this Fill in the Blank Eulogy Template if you need help organizing your thoughts. - Practice, Practice, Practice
Once you’ve written the eulogy, practice it several times. Rehearsing out loud will help you feel more confident and familiar with the flow of the speech. Try practicing in front of a mirror, or with a close friend or family member who can provide feedback. - Mark Your Pauses
Build in moments where you can pause during your speech to take a breath, have a sip of water, or simply collect yourself. Having these planned pauses can give you time to gather your emotions if needed. - Familiarize Yourself with the Space
Arrive early to the location of the service so you can get comfortable with where you’ll be speaking. Knowing what the space looks like and where you’ll be standing can help reduce anxiety. - Bring a Backup
It’s always a good idea to bring a printed copy of the eulogy with you. You might also consider giving a copy to someone else, just in case you feel too emotional to continue. This way, they can step in for you if needed.
What If You Get Emotional While Delivering the Eulogy?
Even with the best preparation, emotions can still surface unexpectedly while delivering a eulogy. Here’s how to handle it if that happens:
- Pause and Breathe
If you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, don’t be afraid to pause. Taking a moment to breathe deeply can help you regain your composure. It’s okay if there’s silence for a few seconds—it’s a natural part of the process. - Have Water Nearby
Having a glass of water can be a small but effective way to soothe your throat and give you a brief moment to collect yourself. - Acknowledge Your Emotions
It’s perfectly okay to say something like, “This is difficult for me,” or “I’m feeling emotional right now.” Acknowledging how you feel can ease the pressure of trying to hold everything in. This can also help your audience feel connected to what you’re saying. - Embrace the Tears
Tears are a natural part of grief, and crying during a eulogy is nothing to be ashamed of. If you need to cry, let yourself. People will understand, and your honesty will be appreciated.
Practical Tips to Help Manage Emotions
Beyond pausing and breathing, here are a few practical tips that can help keep emotions in check while delivering a eulogy:
- Visualize a Calm and Confident Delivery
Before the day of the service, spend a few moments imagining yourself delivering the eulogy with calmness and composure. Visualization is a powerful technique that can prepare your mind and body for the real experience. - Consider a Shared Eulogy
If you’re worried about being able to get through the entire eulogy, consider asking a family member or friend to share the speech with you. They can be on standby to step in if your emotions become too overwhelming. - Dress Comfortably
Wearing something that makes you feel comfortable and confident can make a big difference. Avoid anything that might add to your stress, like tight or uncomfortable clothing.
Additional Considerations for Delivering a Meaningful Eulogy
- Prepare for Silence: Silence doesn’t have to be awkward. If you need a moment to collect yourself, don’t feel rushed to speak. A quiet pause can allow others to reflect on what you’ve said.
- Take Your Time: Speak slowly and take your time. Rushing through your words can make it harder to stay composed.
- Remember, It’s About the Loved One: While it can be intimidating to stand in front of an audience, remember that the eulogy is ultimately about honoring your loved one’s life. Focus on sharing their story and the impact they had on the world.
More Resources on Writing and Delivering a Eulogy
If you’re looking for additional support on writing or delivering a eulogy, here are some helpful resources:
